It Makes a Difference to the Sheep

THINGS TO DO IF (LIKE ME) YOU'RE PLANNING ON GOING TO SEE THE RETURN OF THE KING TOMORROW. Highlights:

Block the entrance to the theater while screaming: "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!"

After the movie, say "Lucas could have done it better."

At some point during the movie, stand up and shout: "I must go! Middle Earth needs me!" and run and try to jump into the screen. After bouncing off, return quietly to your seat.

Ask the nearest ring-nut if he thinks Gandalf went to Hogwarts

Finish off every one of Elrond's lines with "Mr. Anderson."

On second, thought, I don't think I'll follow any of this advice.