It Makes a Difference to the Sheep

Taking on the resurgence of the mullet and other fashion mistakes that should have been left well alone; taking on John Kerry's candid interview with GQ

This part seemed typical:

"Kerry tells Hainey that he had a telephone relationship with Marlon Brando in 1985 and 1986, during the contras: 'He took a huge interest in it. And he would call me. He was always asking questions. And he'd give me advice. I took his advice on a couple of angles. A couple of points.'

Which ones? Perhaps the article has the details, and we will learn that Kerry based his pro-Sandinista policies on Mr. Brando’s keen grasp of Central American political dynamics. After all, Mr. Brando appeared, dimly, in a movie about a war set in a hot place with many broad-leafed plants, which gave him keen insights on the geopolitical struggle that temporarily manifested itself in Nicaragua.

taking on "Give Peace a Chance"; and considering how the GQ reporter would have written about its "A beer with ..." series with teetotaller George W. Bush

“Mind if I have a beer?” you ask. “That’s sort of the angle we use for this segment.” Bush's reaction:

1. With a tight expression, and beady eyes that dart left and right before fixing on you with the strange, almost unworldly hatred that the Salem judges must have felt for the voluptuous women they sought to hang for witchcraft, the president gives a curt nod of approval

2. “Hey, it’s August in Washington. Gotta cool down. I’m going to stick with this coke, if I can get a refill here? See, she won’t give me one. Thinks I should switch to the diet stuff. Alright, what’s your first question?"

Your call.

All in one bleat. Just read the whole dang thing.